A Tip To Make You Less Nervous.

by Jonathon on September 28, 2009 · No Comments

This one struck me the other night when I ran into a fellow student of the seduction community at the Argyle.

Oh my God – were the women there glorious –

… so many beautiful legs, and ample bosom (and that was just LoGun with his shirt off) – it got even better after that.

This chap was being shown the finer art of “kino” by a ‘dating guru’…

So I asked the lad how his night had been going.

His response was fairly typical of the “sarging noob”:

“It’s been up and down.”

I queried further, “What have the highlights of the evening been for you?”

His response: “The kino stuff that I learned has been incredible. It’s just great”.

Me: “So what’s been “down” about the night?” Him: “I haven’t got a root yet”.

To put it bluntly, saying this guy didn’t have much confidence is an understatement – again, fairly typical of seduction community noobs…

but his mistake is one that isn’t just common amongst noobs, I also see it among the most experienced of PUAs, MPUAs, whatever you want to call them…

He was purely there to see what he could get from her or any other woman he approached that night. And he had no idea what he would offer women in return.

Which brings me to the point of this post.

We all got into this game because we felt something lacking .. something we thought a woman could fill. We didn’t have the skills. Some of us were virgins.

Some of us were bitter about how an ex-girlfriend treated us. Some of us wanted to prove something to ourselves. And others.

Whatever it was, it never actually involved HER.

In the business world, we trade for what we want; do favours for a business we want to build a business relationship with. You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.

But somehow, this didn’t translate in the pickup community. It was all summed up with one phrase that many of you hold on to dearly: YOU’RE the prize.

But are you?

I mean, what DO you have to offer a woman who is gracious enough to share her body with you? Or deeper still – her emotions, fantasies, and vulnerability?

Do you actually deserve them?

Have you ever asked that question of yourself?

Or are you trying to use these women so you can prove that you actually ARE worth it – because you still, D-E-E-P D-O-W-N, you don’t believe that you are?

Well, gentlemen, what makes you the kind of man that actually IS the prize?

How could just your presence gift these wonderful women? Unashamedly, unapologetically, un-judgingly (is that a word – my spell check seems to recognise it).

What are your qualities? And your gifts?

Remember these the next time you enter a ‘set’ and try to gift the interaction.

Rather than just trying to take from it (whether it be ‘practice’, a root, a k-close, a number close, to qualify her for your time etc), and just watch how this one little change in YOUR PURPOSE can change the complete interaction in a very positive way.