Just Be Yourself – Why Being Yourself Can Suck.
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“Just be yourself”!
This advice from your mother had the seduction community gurus rolling in its grave.
“Your mum doesn’t know what she’s talking about”, the pickup gurus said.
“She has no idea what women want”, urged others.
And you swallowed their advice, hook, line and sinker, allowing your lack of success with women to be the fault of dear old mum.
I hate to tell you, but mum was kinda right. It’s just that nobody was listening to her properly.
You see, you thought that ‘being yourself’ meant acting in the way you had been acting around women that, of course, lead you to the incredibly frustrated point you were at when you stumbled across this community.
I’m here to tell you that you’re never “been yourself.”
The self you were portraying in the past AND the self you are portraying now are RARELY your real self.
The person you are in the company of attractive women, the person you are out and about in society, the person you are around most of your colleagues, is most likely a suppressed version of yourself.
Let me ask you: how often do you hold back in a social situation? You know, when you’re in a group, and you really want to do something, but for some unknown reason, you don’t do it.
You don’t want to rock the boat, I’ve heard some of you say. Or maybe you were worried about fitting in properly.
The end result was you compromising who you are – because you thought that they would think that that was not cool.
In other words, you weren’t being yourself – you portrayed the image you thought they wanted to see. The image of what’s acceptable. The ‘norm’.
You’ve been doing it with women pre, mid, and for some post-seduction community. It’s just manifested itself in different ways.
So, what’s the alternative?
Well, it’s not easy because you’re not used to it, but it’s pretty simple: give yourself permission to shine, to be fully expressed: balls out, furiously you.
And I’m not talking about the you that wants to cover his insecurities by fucking any hot woman that comes your way.
I’m talking about the you that knows there’s more to what’s going on than you let yourself experience, express, and be part of.
The you that knows it can inspire, knows it can lead, knows it can uplift.
That ‘you’ can be pretty hard to find, and if you think you’ll find it by learning a new routine, trick, or paradigm for being around women, you’ll unfortunately be disappointed.
That journey lies inward, as the real voice of you is very faint right now, and until you can hear it crystal clear, you’ve got some digging to do.
When you come from that core, in any interaction, you are an inspiration for those around you, because by leading by example you are giving those you touch the permission to shine with you.
Jonathon
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