The Death Of Dating Advice.

by Steven on May 27, 2010 · No Comments

“The world doesn’t need any more dating advice”.

This was the thought which I woke to this morning.

And it’s not all bad news.

Death, like birth, is an inevitable part of expansion. And in the ash-heap of dating advice history..

..will emerge an opportunity for something new and totally different to sprout.

The only question is .. what?

It’s obvious that we’re experiencing an over-saturation of dating advice on the Internet.

What’s not immediately obvious is that it’s coupled with increasing concerns about its ability to solve the “dating issues” of most men.

And you know what? This trend extends past dating advice.

Have you heard of the “internet marketing” market?

It also goes by other names like “make money online”, “fire your boss” and “finally quit your dayjob which sucks and do nothing while making lots of money” market.

Can you spot a commonality between “dating advice” and “internet marketing”?

Yes, both are crowded. Yes, both are getting more crowded every day as more hopefuls re-trace the footsteps of others.

Yes, as a result of that, there is very little innovation .. both in product content and in business models.

Yes, we have been just watching more and more “me-too” businesses pop up, each one trying to differentiate on claims to being “the best” and “number 1″.

Yes, both markets have fragmented to the point where they now have distinct sub-niches..

..where you can purchase everything from products on “college game” to “text game” products to “facebook magic” and “google cash sniffers”.

But what’s the most important commonality, which we still haven’t explored?

Well, the message sent by both is this:

“Get the X and then you’ll be happy”.

Where “X” is either “WOMEN” or “MONEY”, depending on whether you’re selling dating advice or internet marketing.

Apart from that little distinction, the tactics of those using “dating advice” to get women and those using “online marketing” to get cash are pretty much the same.

Don’t believe me? Let’s try this..

Go to a club = buy traffic.
Go to a street = do SEO (search engine optimisation).
Open target using a bold opener = headline.
Demonstrate value = offer something of value.
Tease = play with emotions.
Number close decisively = capture email address using solid squeeze page.
Deal with flaking = conversion problems.
Run text game = send email marketing newsletter.
Demonstrate social proof = show testimonials.
Overcome last minute resistance = objections.
Sex = sale.

Oh, boy.

Those of you who are familiar with internet marketing are probably getting this. If you don’t, don’t worry – you haven’t missed out on much.

It gets more interesting when you realise that most “dating advice” is sold using “internet marketing” principles.

Which in effect means that you, a male dating advice consumer, and an average woman in the street have more in common than you realise..

..you’re both being “gamed” in the same way.

How do I know all this? Well, I’ve been doing “internet marketing” for years.

So when I speak of the transgressions above, I’m pointing the finger first and foremost at myself.

So if you’ve been the subject of my so-called marketing, then I’m truly sorry. You deserve a lot better.

And this brings me to the metaphorical ash-heap which I mentioned at the start. Just like I found the effort involved in “sarging” women and seducing them using dating advice empty..

..I’m finding that the results I produced using conventional “internet marketing” leave me desiring something different.

Not more of the same. Different.

Hence my recent emails of a “confessional” nature to you recently..

..as I’m finding that most of my attachment to what I’ve built within AI, in the ways of its current marketing model, the business model, the HR plan, the financial projections and so on, using those ways is gone.

And in this void, in this lack of attachment, in this desire for something different, in this ash-heap I see a space for THAT something new to emerge.

The only question is .. what?

Which brings me to the reason I woke up with that thought this morning. Because this morning I wasn’t surrounded by a “Get more X and I’ll be happy” kind of energy.

Rather, I was in a state which felt like, “I’m complete. Now what does the world need?”.

And the answer was what I have already shared with you:

“The world doesn’t need any more dating advice”.

Where to from here? I’m still not sure. But I’ll keep you posted. Brace yourselves ; )

Steven